Most of Y'all can skip this one

I've been having a lot of little issues with a bunch of weak minded people.

I call them weak minded because they are led by basic instincts. They succumb to whatever whim gives them direction and expect the World to deal with it. Somehow, these people forget that the World owes them nothing. That I, OWE THEM NOTHING. Not patience. Not forgiveness. Not understanding. Not grace. These things I offer to achieve my goal of not allowing their actions to bind me to an emotion I never wanted to feel more than once during my life.

I seek freedom. Freedom from mental slavery. Freedom from emotional slavery. Freedom from physical slavery. I seek freedom, plain & simple. I am very willing to work for my freedom; to sacrifice blood, sweat & tears for my freedom. The people that criticize me aren't nearly as determined. They are nearly as concerned with being better people. What they are really concerned with is allaying themselves of guilt and somehow placing fault, blame and the humiliation of failure on others who can "handle" the added shame. Scapegoating.

At the turn of the new year, I had some extremely deep emotional connections tempt me with a rageful response. I did not respond to the call. Throughout the weeks, I've had others tempt me with rageful responses. I still have yet to respond to the calls. I understand that the things I say are not perfect. But that isn't a hard concept to comprehend. Each person takes words differently than the next. So, if you call me a turkey with no provocation and I call you a chicken BUT you turn what I say into an insult, who did who wrong? Didn't you just try to guilt me with your emotional baggage? I wonder.

See, I'm not against posting my conversations with people up for the crowd to judge. I know that the crowd will not be on my side. However, the one thing NOBODY can say about ANYTHING I say to anybody is that it is offensive or disrespectful. I adhere closely to social mores(for the most part). But when we dice the character of each, my consistency and dedication to morality, it is easy to decide who is the instigator of the discord.

I'm not really upset. I am however dismayed that I've surrounded myself with so many malcontents. I stick to self awareness, openness, communication and humility. It is said that the people you surround yourself with most are the people that are most like you(even if you cannot see it). However, I don't see any resemblances other than skin color. And we don't really get along much at all. Matter of fact, the only person I feel like I'm truly like is my father. We don't have disagreements. We pretty much agree on everything UNLESS I'm being emotional. From not knowing who he was or looked like years ago, to secretly overcoming my anger & resentment towards him for not being in my life for 20 years, to cultivating an understanding of life from an emotional vantage point while working fervently to remain balanced amid the chaotic climate of my world, I believe he and I have come a tremendous way in our father/son relationship. I am very proud to call him father & it has absolutely nothing to do with money. This is something I could gift to those who have issues with me because it is a common theme: Daddy issues. Both male and female but especially FEMALES.

They simply don't know how to treat a man; be treated by a man or how to pick a man. She should pick a man for his values, beliefs and character. If he says what he means, does what he says and holds his own word in high regards, then she should feel comfortably in choosing him.

Point is, whether I'm idealistically wrong or right, I can show the progression from A-Z of my thoughts. I don't do irrational things. I don't make irrational excuses. I don't irrationally blame people. I do get mad when they cannot live up to their own words or violate some standard of social consensus.

Again, you only lose when you leave me. I'm okay with that. I was okay before you. I'll be okay afterwards. I'm a lone wolf. I stand alone. The Alpha of one.