I was upset until...

I was mad. I was upset. I was angry.

I felt disrespected. I felt unappreciated. I felt so many different ways and it overwhelmed me. I was crumbling under the pressure. I had no where to turn. I had already used all of my resources to make it this far. I'm a silly guy. This way I feel in my chest betrays the reality of the situation: I did everything I could and didn't lose out.

I refused to squander any situation or any amount of time. I was a self-sustained cold fusion machine of passion, desire, presence & drive. And I was fed upon as suckers usually are. It embittered me boldly as such pains typically do. Instead of falling to the urge; I rose to one knee and decided to see it through. This is where I decided to discard the bitterness of being made to feel as a lesser individual had left me with. This is the most important step. Acceptance & understanding. Not some false apathetic boisterous facade of machismo and remnants of a broken heart . I'm stronger than any person could break. I'm always going to search to overcome.

I took a moment of pause and surveyed my long held nemesis. When I had acquired whatever I deemed necessary to feel contented with my inquiry, I sat back and exhaled. "Oh, yeah." I let loose with the next fall of my chest. I gave them value, validity and worth. My intentions weren't good enough for these people but their intentions were supposed to be enough for me. I find the hypocrisy incredibly humorous. I find the fact that they could not observe the hypocrisy even more humiliating for themselves and hilarious to me. And I thought, "Why am I so upset that these people are stupid?".

I'm smart because I pay attention. I'm intelligent because I paid my tuition and made sure to get something out of it. I'm aware because I removed my head from my ass in order to interact with the World as it is; instead of attempting to change the World to fit my tiny little brain. Perhaps, the best way to cover the topic at hand is to put it within the constraints of capacity. I'm deeper, wider and faster flowing than most anyone I've ever seen. And this is considering that I haven't seen barely anybody at their best. (You may be thinking something along the lines....who am I kidding? Your mind is probably blank or thinking about the benign at the moment).

So, this boils down to being about how I learn just how valuable I am day in and day out. How rare it is to be a man who can see the World the way I do. I once thought I was merely "different", but I have come to learn that I am simply "epic". I am a singularity. I am a brilliant spectacle to be held in a captivating marvel. You & anyone you came with are fair to disagree, that is fine and dandy. I, however, have been proven as a different type of being.

Matter of fact, I'm not simply being. I'm not simply doing or existing. I couldn't even agree that I'm living either. I. AM. LIFE.
As I type that, the unease in my chest is dwindling rapidly. As I type, my chagrin and feelings of disparity are resolving themselves. I have time. If I don't have time; I still have time. Why? Because I have now. Now is all that ever mattered anyway. I was upset until that point.