Post to End All Post

This is a mentality I adopted that mirrors a song that is currently out "Like its my Last" and an ideology "Live each day like its your last" that the song borrowed much of its worth from.

Also, I try and love every woman that gets close to my heart like she is the last that I will ever love. This keeps my losses painful and bitter. This keeps me always willing to work. This keeps me naive to the truth of incompatibility.
If you are reading this, then you know me well enough to know that I'm not just a person who sees myself as different but that many other people see me as different too. Often, this different is a bad thing. People love the things that are most like themselves. I speak purely from the perspective of corporate speak and the job world in general. The amount of insecurity and ridiculousness that occurs frequently is insurmountable not because it is impossible but because it is the individuals involved that are unwilling to create a better version of themselves. Instead, these people attempt to create a "truer" version of self, sometimes unaware of the constraints and disability involved in that character. Point is, this influences work life & home life. Point is being told I'm different yet being expected to fall within the same tracks for progress is not only an idiot expectation but an unreasonable one as well. And this takes me back to why I brought it up in the first place, despite my infinite love and truth behind that, loving like its my last love has been the most destructive thing in my life. And so I write and I write like its my last.
This however is the purpose of this entire post...I'm going to stop living like its my last; I'm going to stop loving like its my last; I'm going to stop being so well intending. Why? because I see a greater and far more poetic beauty in preparation coupled with reckless abandon.

I'm writing a will explaining everything I know, have hidden or loss/miss. I will define my truest words and etch them in stone. Then I will live like life doesn't matter and only what I want is significant.

I was a person who wouldn't sacrifice the tears of a friend for personal gain. Now I'd sell anybody I could convince to buy themselves off to slavery too themselves.

Not anyone can love me back to life. I lost all my hopes and I only have dreams but in my dreams, I'm not the man that you might see being helpful and loving. I'm that shadow that chases you around your thoughts awaiting a moment of carelessness with which to implement my version of doom. I am love. I am passion.